Literally, I Cant (Believe it’s not butter) – Redfoo, and the downfall of modern ‘music’


Oh Redfoo, just when I thought I couldn’t despise you and your ridiculous hair any longer you go and do something like Literally, I Cant.

You would think, being an extremely unattractive and majorly untalented musician(???) who rode his record label owner father’s coat tails into semi-stardom, Redfoo would hold an interest in maximizing his undeserved time in the sun by continuing to play it safe with songs like Party Rock Anthem and Lets Get Ridiculous, which in my opinion are the musical equivalent of soggy cabbage. But alas, it seems the 39 year old man-child is determined to show the world just how much of a trust funded moron he really is.

This song is a train wreck. Actually it’s an insult to train wrecks. A train wreck never told women to “shut the fuck up” because they don’t want to dance or insinuated that they are unintelligent beings whose only asset is their bodies. I was honestly surprised, after listening to this atrocity and watching the vomit-inducing music video, that my eyes and ears hadn’t become sentient and decided to detach themselves from my head in an attempt to avoid the mind-fuckingly offensive shit pile that is Literally, I can’t.

Even as I write this, I find myself struggling to click play again on YouTube, even if only to gain quotes and observations. Normally, I would just Google the lyrics to the song, but the only results you get are news articles regarding the overwhelming backlash from this song.

With a Music Video set in a Frat House (its rapey already) and lyrics like “I said jump on the pole. I didn’t mean your opinion” and “You got a big ol’ butt, I can tell by the way you walkin’. But you annoying Bitch, because you’re talking” its hard to see how anyone could defend this limp attempt at music. But wait! Our boy Redfoo has tried to do just that, further cementing his place atop the I’m-a-misogynistic-asshole podium.

He claims critics have misinterpreted his work, that the song is ok because it doesn’t use the word slut, and that it’s actually a “comical party song to satirize the cliché”. Besides showing us that Redfoo doesn’t understand what satire is, these attempts at justifying a song that comes dangerously close to appropriating rape culture are an insult to the intelligence and values of us as an audience. After all the recent publicity regarding sexual assault in Colleges and the sexual harassment of women, he literally goes and makes a college themed music video about women being objects, while never once addressing why a 39 year old man is at a College Party.

Now, while its becoming painstakingly obvious that Redfoo, despite being a giant tool, is not the sharpest one in the shed, we have to give credit to some of the other players. Shout out to the rap duo Play-N-Skillz, who spend the song asking women if they’d like some alcohol or to participate in “girl-on-girl”, and of course the venerable and always creative Lil Jon, who along with his trademark “WHAT?!” is responsible for yelling “SHUT THE FUCK UP” at the women in the video when they decline to partake in the aforementioned libations and/or lesbian acts.

Combine this bunch of close minded fuckboys with the kind of cookie-cutter backing track normally associated with Redfoo’s Band(???) LMFAO, throw in a bunch of female actors and extras who don’t seem to give a shit about the objectification of their gender, and finish with just a sprinkle of porn site product placement, and presto, you’ve got the recipe for one of the most misogynistic, offensive, and downright terrible songs ever created. Maybe its time for Redfoo to hang up the lens-less sunglasses and go back to being mediocre at tennis or whatever the fuck else he does when he’s not making shitty music.



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