Insulted by a Toddler v2.0

Such is life, I used to be a pretty active person. I have never felt the need to step foot in a gym, but we both joined the local gym last year. True to form, neither of us have been yet. (6 months later)

I did make a news years resolution to go to the gym. But this is still yet to eventuate. I am pretty happy with how I am, but you know, I miss the physical activity and I do feel it. Life just gets in the way as I’m sure you all know.

Our toddler, in all his wisdom managed to insult me again the other day. I am starting to think he does it on purpose.

So, I was getting dressed for work in the morning. He was in our bedroom with the dog, going about their usual morning routine. Now, I am the kind of person that can’t be ass’ed un-clipping my belt, un-zipping my pants etc, I just pull the bastards up and be done with it. As I begin to wriggle into my pants, he begins to laugh.

‘Dad, your butt’s jiggly’

‘It’s like jelly’

Of course, met with laughter from my partner. The fuck kid, did you just call me fat?!?

Once again, insulted by the 3ft tall midget.

Time to make good on that new years resolution…… My butt looks like jelly, god damn.

There will likely be a lesson for him out of this. Something along the lines of…. NEVER SAY THAT TO YOUR MUM dude… 🙂

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5 comments

  1. LOL! My kids have nicknames for everyone in our family. Bryn is ‘Panties’ b/c we are always seeing her underwear. Bryce is ‘Toots’ b/c, well, the answer should be obvious. Daddy is ‘Grumpy’ and I am ‘Juicy.’ Yeah, that’s right, my kids nicknamed me Juicy for my booty. And that’s why I now have a gym membership and a personal trainer. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. My daughter who is 12 mentioned that I’m starting to look fat as I attempted to catch a tan in the beginning of the year…hence my latest workout regime.

    The Wife couldn’t stop laughing, until I flipped the joke on her. Lesson? Never call a woman fat. Even if she loves you.

    Liked by 1 person

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