Awesome

The Origin of the Child Leash

Seems to be quite the hot topic with a lot of parents. To leash, or not to leash. Fuck’s sake, some kids I see running wild could also use a matching mussel, perhaps Hello Kitty will bring out a range for Christmas this year. One can only hope.

In all seriousness, I am not a fan of the leash. I don’t even really like to tether the dog, but have no choice as she isn’t quite as up on the English language as our 4 year old human.

After reading some rant today on Facebook about a child of a leash I got to thinking about the lighter side of child abuse. One of the posts was carrying on about some old lady pulling a kid along like it was a resentful pug unwilling to take a bath. Disgusting to say the least. Another post started raving on about how we have not needed leashes for children in the past, so why all of a sudden do we need them now.

Hold that thought….. Have you ever asked yourself the question: What is the origin of theLouis15 child leash?……

If not then never mind, I did all the work for you. Turns out there is actually some kind of circa 1990 style HTML homage to the history of restraining your toddlers. From what I have determined, this whole leash business started early in the 17th century, perhaps late 16th century. (Although this website makes note of telling us they have found no evidence in the 16th century yet).

Take a look at this baby. It is a painting of a young Louis XV with a child leash on. I highly doubt the leash is of any consequence that young Louis pictured here would turn out to be
known as Louis the Beloved, but perhaps being restricted to a one meter radius around his caregiver  fostered a sense of empathy.

Hell, good enough for the French, good enough for… ummm…. Just don’t bind your child folks, it isn’t a dog.

Oh yeah, after almost a year without so much as a whisper on the blog, I am back. 🙂

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Christians Against Dinosaurs

Poor T-Rex can’t catch a break. bastardised for his taste in food, given small, useless arms and now being attacked by Christianity.

Yep, this exists. There is also a Facebook page called ‘Christians Against Dinosaurs.’ I couldn’t help but laugh. Check this link too for a best-of collection. 🙂

Last night, my partner showed me a post from a concerned mother ranting about the impact dinosaurs are having on her children. Dinosaurs are evil, apparently.

So, true to Christian form, she burned her children’s dinosaur toys at the stake. Well, stake not included, but you get the idea. She burned them good and proper. Need to make sure they don’t come back to life right, a dinosaur zombie apocalypse is the last thingraptor-jesus we need. Better pray on that tonight.

In all honesty, I apologise to any of you who are religious, I don’t mean to offend you. But seriously, what did dinosaurs ever do to Jesus? Or is ‘dinosaur’ really a codename for Jews?

Either way, wow, there are people out there who debate the existence of dinosaurs. Fuck man, to quote the late great Bill Hicks, ‘I think you were put here to test my faith dude.’

You may also be happy to know, like I was, that there is a somewhat dinosaur revolution going on against their oppressors. Another Facebook group exists, ‘Dinosaurs Against Christianity.’ I am now a member of it to show my support for the T-Rex’s noble cause. That is, the right to be recognised raptorlogicas a legitimate part of history… Just like Jesus is… Umm no, sorry bad joke.

To all the dinosaur skeptics out there, let me make one thing clear. There is NOTHING in the Bible that says Jesus WAS NOT a raptor. Nothing, not one piece of evidence. He may very well have been a raptor, or maybe a T-Rex. Or maybe just a religious allegory for the ‘sun’. Who knows. Just throwing it out there.

Viva La Dinosaur’!!!

Same old blog, great new taste

Inspired by some comments left by fellow blogger and friend Carol from ‘Time for my thoughts…..‘ last year i have decided to update the theme for the blog. Also got a little push from a post on ‘A Momma’s View’ called ‘Be The Change’.

This did not happen with great ease as i have only just come to learn that i have grown a little attached to this thing… After a day of procrastination and fooling about with around ten or so different themes, i have settled for this one.

So, the blog has a new look for 2015!!

Would appreciate your thoughts and/or feedback on how it is. I will certainly take them into account, however, i am staying firm and not going back to my old one. 🙂

Oh, yeh, i also got a bit of a haircut over the holidays. Moving away from the ”is that guy homeless?’ look….

Building a Kid’s Kitchen for Dummie’s

Last year, we wanted to do something different, something cool for our little guy for Christmas.

Do you have one of those old TV cabinets from the 90’s that no longer have a purpose? startWell, we didn’t, but we found one for less than $20. After about a week of procrastination, inadvertently injuring myself, and some final touches, we have ourselves a functioning kid’s play kitchen. It is all painted in chalkboard paint too, so he can go for his life with the drawing. Which is the flavour of the month right now, along with cooking. 🙂

Note, i work in an office…. I am certainly no handyman, but i managed to pull this off.. 🙂

1. The painting (and 2sanding). I decided to paint the majority of the cabinet before cutting holes etc.. not sure why, but i think it ended up being a good call. I also had to sand the varnish off prior to this..

2. Cutting holes and stuff. So, i decided to go and buy a tap and a silver mixing bowl. The bowl would act as my sink basin, and the tap, well, it’s a tap. I borrowed a jig-saw from my father-in-law. Not having actually used one of these things before, i was a bit concerned…. But of course, i did not let him know i was a total DIY noob….

holesI spent about two hours boring out a hole to fit the saw bit into… after some serious finger pain, i was there. The hole/s were then cut. Measured expertly by drawing around the bowl and tap with a pen, and taking off ‘about’ a centimetre.

After that ordeal, i glued and screwed (hey, that rhymed) the sink and tap into place.

3. Oven and Fridge Doors. Next were the makeshift doors. I had originally taken off the original doors as they were damaged. I ran up to the local hardware store and gave them my measurements. Then i got to the painting, again. Once completed, i thendoors got them both on. The oven door also folds down, so i put in a few screwed in chains that hold it up to stop little hands and feet getting hurt.

4. Final Touches. I couldn’t believe my work. I had pulled off the impossible, for under $250. My partner designed a window for the kitchen, and went out to get some toy goodies to complete the set. The window is an A3 frame with a custom Pokemon themed garden. I think it’s pretty bad ass.. Well, below is the result. I am happy to say it was a big hit on Christmas day with all the kids.

There is something nice about a hand made gift. We both felt good about it, and i hope one day he looks back and thinks, ‘damn, my parents were awesome, they made that kitchen. I should do something for my kids like that’. Then it will be mission complete. 🙂

DSC_0110If you would like a list of items and/or some detailed instructions for something similar, let me know via the contact page. I am more than happy to lend you some of my new found knowledge. 🙂

Reddit Gifts and Christmas (even a dildo)

Happy New Year everyone. After an eventful Christmas period i am back to the blog, sadly back to work as well. Given that i have a few things to cover on the blog, i will be doing so in sort-of- chronological order since my sign off post back in December.

So, for those that have read my post about RedditGifts, i received a pretty amazing gift from my secret santa last year.

You know the old saying, when it rains, it pours. Such was the few months leading up to Christmas for us. Broken down cars, sick puppy dogs, sick people, brother-in-law needed money… The list goes on. Given the tight times we had fell into, i am very thankful my partner has a fondness for Christmas akin to that of a five year old. We had all our shopping done (food aside), months in advance. Santa would indeed be coming, no question about that.

However, we had also decided to host our traditional family Christmas lunch. Twenty odd people… My inner Grinch was getting to me. To add to this, we also had ‘elected’ to look after my sister-in-laws four kids Christmas Eve so they could set up some bigger presents’ in the backyard. Meaning, with my last pay for the years going in Christmas Eve, we would be destined to take five screaming children into the supermarket on Christmas Eve to complete the last of our food shopping….. Grinch getting cranky now…

My Reddit santa had other ideas….

The morning the gift arrived began like any other, sleep in, wake up, feed dog, feed toddler, have coffee, have smoke, have coffee, feed toddler, have smoke. Then the post came. I was actually expecting my gift that day, as i received a message from my santa on Reddit advising to stay home and wait. So, with anticipation, a little box arrives. Awesome. We get to the opening, ummm…. whaa? This was not for us. I check thee address, it was for some lady a few streets up the road. So i walk the ‘package’ up to her house to drop it off. I apologised for opening it, she was ok with that, just happy i’d brought it around. Oh, by the way, not shitting you, it was a ten inch dildo…. She was like fifty years old… ick…

So with my coffee welling up inside me ready to come out like a bad hangover, i walk back home. No more than ten minutes later, our gift arrives.

A truck from the supermarket… umm, what?

Yes, a truck, filled with yummy food, a few toys and some doggy treats. Wow, what an amazing random act of kindness from a total stranger. And wow, what impeccable timing, NO CHRISTMAS EVE SHOPPING!!

My santa did leave me her number in case the delivery went sour. We called her just to say thanks, it was all a little overwhelming.

Thank you so much random person. We love you.

just-amazing

Hope you all keep watch for my next post. I will be going through the drama i had restoring a piece of furniture to create a kids kitchen for Christmas. Note, i AM NOT a handyman by any means… 🙂

Christmas is about giving

Just thought i would post this idea as a few of our friends with kids have also adopted it over the last few years.

We have a little boy, 3 years old, who gets very spoilt by everyone. Half his luck, cute little bugger!

Anyway, last year we reached a conclusion around November that we would either have to get an additional room built onto the house to accommodate for his growing collection of toys, or attempt to get rid of some.

My partner and i are always supporting charity, and doing what we can with what we have to make other people’s lives a little bit easier. It is something that we also want our young one to grow up participating in.

As such, we developed a plan to get him to understand the Christmas isn’t about a fat white guy in a red suit handing out toys, it is about family, and giving more so than receiving.

So we sat him down one afternoon and said, ‘look dude, you have alot of toys, some you dont play with anymore. Santa is going to be bringing a whole lot more this year too.’.. ‘YAY!!!’

‘We want you to grab this box and go and fill it up with toys you dont need any more. Then when Santa comes at Christmas we are going to leave the box out for him to take. Some boys and girls don’t have any toys, and Santa needs help to make sure they do.’

Without hesitation, he runs into his room and comes out with a box full. ‘Here you go guys, Santa can take these for the other boys and girls.’

I then go and drop these to a local charity on Christmas Eve.

This will be the 2nd year we have done Christmas this way, and i think it is a good way to get our little guy to understand the true spirit of Christmas. A few of our friends loved our idea and now do the same. It is a much cheap option than house renovations… 🙂

To add to this success, this year a house down the road burnt down. We went to watch, our toddler noticed some kids lived there. When we got home, he went and rounded up a bag of toys for them. (we didn’t even ask him). ‘Here you go guys, the kids in the burned house need some toys, they can have these ones.’

Makes me happy he thinks like this now. 🙂

Best

-Ray

Give a Gift to a Total Stranger Through Reddit

My partner and I have been on RedditGifts for quite some time. There is something nice about sending a gift to a total stranger, also receiving one in return. Below post taken from Boston.com, link at the end. You should join up for the Christmas exchange and become part of a Guiness World Record! 🙂

Capture

The best way to spread Christmas cheer is Redditing gifts for those far and near!

Reddit is bringing back its annual Secret Santa program, and if you’re interested, the concept couldn’t be simpler: start a profile, fill out your likes and dislikes, get matched up with another Redditor and buy your new stranger friend a present based on their interests. Aside from the purchase of a gift, participation is free.

As of Nov. 20, over 150,800 santas were signed up for this year’s swap, spanning across 175 countries.

This giant online gift exchange started in 2009, but rapidly grew in popularity each year. In 2013, over 85,000 people across over 120 countries came together to break the Guinness World Record for the largest Secret Santa gift exchange. It was the third year in a row that Reddit broke the record, according to Guinness.

And it’s not just a faceless sea of anonymous Redditors: During last year’s Reddit Secret Santa, Bill Gates gave a teenage girl a stuffed-animal cow and a certificate showing that an actual cow had been given to an impoverished family in her honor, through Heifer International.

Other notable Santas include Arnold Schwarzenegger, Shaquille O’Neal, and evenPee-Wee Herman.

Sign up opened on November 2 and ends on December 1.

If the Earth had rings like Saturn… Pretty awesome

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